All my sons - all of the time

I always envied those celebrity mums who would say thing like, "I stay slim running around after my children." and "I make special time for each of my children every day." The latter is even more impressive because Angelina Jolie has six of them !

It has taken me time to work out how to do it, but I have finally got the hang of spending quality time with the boys. At first I did the same things with them both which invariably led to one of them being bored and unruly which spoiled it for the other one (and me). Now I make time to do thing with them individually and tailor the activities to what they love to do. It's been a journey of discovery that has reminded me they are similar, but different and of the value of one to one time.

Last week I took Blue Bear to the theatre to watch Ben and Holly's Magical Kingdom on stage at the Churchill Theatre in Bromley and he loved it. He sat nicely throughout the show and joined in when they asked the children to shout out, although he didn't want to sing the laughter song. At the end he said, "more Ben and Holly Mummy." and I explained that as the are little children they had to go home to go to bed just like he did. He was very upset that it was over. It's so different from the first time we took him to watch a show and when the lights went down he freaked out and didn't want to stay. We took him to meet Sooty, Sweep and Soo after the show, but I think Hubbie was far more impressed than the boys were.

Brown Bear is a different kettle of fish and enjoys nothing more than a day out doing fun stuff like visiting Daddy at work. We went to the Science Museum at the end of the Christmas holidays and as his office is right next door we popped in to see Hubbie for lunch. I have always taken Brown Bear into London and we usually go to the London Transport Museum as it's one of his favourites. In the past we've been ice skating, on a treasure hunt and on a boat trip on the Thames. I have already promised him some one to one time during half term when his brother is at half term camp. It's important to him that we get to do things just us.

Before we adopted Blue Bear everything was about Brown Bear and he loved being the centre of attention. In the summer holidays we would go out and visit the London Transport Museum once a week and visit parks almost every day. We'd go to rhyme time, gymboree and stay and play and he had the busiest schedule of any toddler I knew. I was careful not to overload Blue Bear in the same was as we didn't want to overwhelm him. Helping him settle into the family meant taking things at a pace that would suit him. Even though they absolutely love each other now the early days were pretty tough to negotiate.

We took both the boys to London and planned lots of fun things like an open top bus tour and a boat trip. They bickered and fussed the whole time. What we hadn't accounted for was that Blue Bear wasn't used to days out and Brown Bear had already done all of those things. We needed to do things differently. This is where we had to take them on one at a time. By having one each and giving them special attention they respond far better and we all have a nicer time. For Brown Bear's birthday we went to Legoland and we made sure both boys had a fantastic day. At times we split up and did things separately and then we came together as a family and had fun being trainee firefighters.

When it works it can be amazing. After all I don't have a nanny or a personal trainer to bail me out when I don't feel like being mum. What I do have is a wealth of ideas about how to have fun with my boys.

The day we went to space and still got home in time for tea

With the boys being at different stages of schooling Blue Bear went back to nursery a day earlier than Brown Bear went back to school. I decided that we could take advantage of this 'bonus day' and we went into London. I gave Brown Bear the choice of either going to the London Transport Museum (which he loves) or to the Science Museum in South Kensington. He opted for the latter as it's not one we go to often and I don't think he remembers when we've been before. 

The Science Museum, Natural History Museum and the V & A are all close together and are free, but they do suggest a donation amount. On this visit we found there were queues to get in as there are now desks where you go through security, make a donation and can buy a guide book or map. I guess the voluntary donation system didn't work so well and this is how they ensure better financial returns. The cloakroom is also chargeable with a per item cost and if you want to take part in some activities such as watching an imax movie you have to buy a ticket. Otherwise the general museum is still free - as it always was - and my boy really loved seeing the spacecraft and the suit that Helen Sharman wore. We also went ooh and aah at the transport exhibits such as Puffing Billy and Stephenson's Rocket. I was very conscious of the time so we went to the 3rd floor to explore some of the interactive exhibits. Brown Bear particularly enjoyed designing a space rover and testing it on tough terrain to see if it would survive on the lunar surface. It took quite a few tweaks to the design for it to work, but it was interesting to see how he learned from trying different shapes and wheel placement. 

Designing a space rover

I remember going to the Science Museum with my friend Neil years ago - before children - and we spent a whole day there and only managed to really explore one floor and maybe a bit of another. I was optimistic thinking we'd see much in only a few hours. Also, Hubbie works right next door so we had arranged to meet him for lunch and that was even more exciting for Brown Bear.  

I've always thought we're so lucky to live close to London and to have all the fantastic museums practically on our doorstep. Now that Brown Bear is older I can take him to the places that I've loved so much from my own childhood. As we walked back to the station we passed the ice rink in the grounds of the Natural History Museum and I reminded him that we went there a couple of years ago for a skating session and hot chococlate and he used a penguin to help him get round the rink. "I don't need one now Mummy, I can do it myself." I agreed with him. 

We passed a busker playing Get Lucky on the saxaphone and he said, "That's my song Mummy." I took his hand and said, "Yes it is." and thought how lucky I was to get this special extra day with my boy. 

Winter fun for everyone

I love the winter time. I rock big knitwear, bobble hats, furry lined boots and seek out sparkly Christmas lights. Some of my favourite things to do as a family are during the winter and they're not even that pricey. Here are my top tips for fun stuff to do during the colder months. And no they're not all about Christmas !

Winter Wonderland is ten years old this year

Winter Wonderland has become a bit of a fixture in Hyde Park for years now. We've yet to go, but I've heard good things about it and it's always busy. The event takes over Hyde Park for weeks in the run up to Christmas and offers rides, ice skating and a Christmas market. It's free to go into, but there is a charge for the activities once you're inside and I'm reliably informed that you will have to queue for a while to go on anything so wrap up warm.

One of our new family traditions is a Christmas visit to Birdworld to see Santa. The boys enjoy it and it's really magical walking through the grotto to meet the big man and to check that Percy Penguin isn't napping on the job. We love it because you get to see some animals on the way into the grotto - including reindeer that I am assured are happy and well looked after - and the price includes a present for the children and a mince pie and mulled wine for adults. I know it's not in London, but it's not far so I've included it.

Oxford Street lights 

When I was a kid the big night of our year was when my parents would pile us all into the car to see the Christmas lights in London. This was before every town in the country had it's own big switch on with celebrities. It's still impressive and we take our boys to see all the lights near us and they look forward to seeing them every year.

You can name these lights on Regent's Street 

As a bonus we also used to go and see the seasonal window displays. The highlights for me were Selfridges, Dickens and Jones (remember them ?) and Libertys. We would get out of the car to ooh and aah at the windows of Harrods, Hamleys and occasionally we'd even get out at Trafalgar Square to see the fountains and special Norwegian Christmas tree. It's not an option to get out of a car and stroll any more - sadly. You can still make an evening of it if you are prepared to go on foot and I'd recommend the South Bank with it's winter market stalls and the view of all the lights along the Thames.

Fantasy windows from Oasis 

My personal favourite in the winter is ice skating and the amazing locations with ice rinks seems to increase every year. I've been to the Natural History Museum, Broadgate and Hampton Court Palace to skate and it's great fun. A long established rink at Somerset House is very popular and one of the new kids on the block is a rink next to the London Eye on the South Bank. You can buy packages that include a hot chocolate and skate hire so you can make a night of it ! I took Brown Bear a couple of years back and we booked a penguin to help him skate and had a hot chocolate afterwards, it was great fun. You do have to book a penguin in advance as they are limited in number and they also offer special sessions for toddlers and parents so you don't have to worry about professional show-offs mowing down your children.

Ice Skating in the shadow of dinosaurs 

If you are planning a winter evening out in London there is plenty to do and not all of it will cost money. I think we have some wonderful attractions and family friendly activities that are well worth taking the time to visit. I hope you enjoy them as much as we do. 

An evening adventure in London

Sometimes we make plans to have a grown up night out and arrange babysitting so that we can enjoy each other's company child-free for just a few hours. Last night was supposed to be one of those and we had tickets to see a comedian in London.

Then Hubbie rang me to say there was going to be a rail strike so it was unlikely we'd be able to both make the early start of the show as our babysitter prefers to take care of the boys when at least one of them is already in bed. As we would have had to leave immediately after feeding the boys it wasn't going to happen.

The last time we had tickets to see Stewart Lee I ended up staying home with a poorly child - despite my best efforts to persuade him that he'd be fine if I went out for a few hours. This time it was my turn to go so off I went to negotiate the depleted train services and jam packed streets of London only to arrive out of breath just in time to see the show start.

As it started so early - Hubbie has a theory that Stew is a fan of Bake off and wanted to get home, but I reckon he has to do bedtime for the kids when he gets in - I found myself in London town on an Autumn evening with no rush to get home.

I've always loved walking in London and the evenings are a special time as everything looks so different. I used to run in St James's park with my friend Soraya at lunchtimes. When it's dark it's a much more serene place and the rain spattered roads add a sheen to the whole picture.

Of course I'd have loved to have had a romantic walk hand in hand with Hubbie, but an evening walk in London by myself was a pretty lovely adventure to have. It reminded me to do something for myself every now and again.

Even better I spotted some traffic signs that made me proud that I'm from London. I only managed to catch this one in a photo, but if you're around Trafalger Square you may spot others.

Next time I hope we both get to spend the evening together - not least as it's going to be our anniversary !